Yogurt Life Hacks - Next X

Would you try using yogurt to it's full potential?


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MungoJerry

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Did you know that if you coat your car in a thin layer (1/4") of non-fat greek yogurt that you're invisible to police radar? More specifically, the Ka-Band of police radar which is 90% of the radar used?

History: The SR-71 Blackbird, the American Air Force's premier spy plane of the 1970's, had a Next-Gen Next-X stealth coating. This stealth coating was actually based on the properties of yogurt.

*FUN FACT* Yogurt is an amorphous solid which means it refracts and absorbs light in an interesting way which helped the SR-71 avoid radar at the such declassified elevation of 80,000'.


The Hot Yogurt Bath

The one simple life hack everyone needs to try is the hot yogurt bath. The yogurt's mildly acidic pH aids your skin in releasing toxins into the surrounding proteins. The bacteria that forms the yogurt, Bacitifillus Ghulmugakis, is very soothing and helps relieve eczema symptoms of itching and skin dryness.

Depending on the size of your tub. Anywhere from 30-80 gallons. Try Sams Club, they have small barrels of generic yogurt.

It's preferable if it's pure yogurt, but if absolutely necessary, use only distilled water as to not allow the chlorine in the tap water to interfere with the bacteria's action on your skin.

The ideal temperature of the yogurt is 103*F. Overheating the yogurt causes the bacteria to die at approx 145*F. Conversely, too cold of yogurt doesn't allow the necessary residence time of your skins contact with the yogurt to give your skin a proper treatment. Please use the element from an aquarium because it won’t overtemp the yogurt.
 
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Reactions: Lowcountry25
One time I was at BK and the cashier looked a little sweet na’mean? He asked what I liked on my burger and I said the usual things: lettuce, tomato, onion, yogurt, mushrooms, etc. he gave me the most curious look. Haha. Visit yogurtboi.love
 
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Reactions: whitefish21
This thread is predicted on the knowledge that yogurt has secret benefits , not that bing bongs of all kinds like it. Get it together people....?
 
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Reactions: tobyloveswar
Also, I figure if I coat my phone in yoghurt, the government can't track it anymore. But then I can't use google maps to find my way to the grocery store around the corner.

Can't win.
 

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